Mood/activities/thoughts: (night) Heart just sank, so deep. With a blink of an eye, you could easily give us up. I could never act the way you do. The toxicity has brought me to tears once again, do I ever learn? Do I ever learn that someone who can easily give me up doesn’t truly want to love me for me, but for themselves?

Tarot Card: 7 of Swords, upright

Notes on card: deception, betrayal, lies, trickery, cheating, lack of conscience, infidelity, someone trying to get away with something but might be discovered, stop playing if you want something real, you may not be aware of others’ deceptive behavior, be careful of sneakiness, putting yourself and your needs first, manipulation, cunning, enemies who pretend to be friends, someone has to face the consequences–embarrassment, punishment, or worse

Reflection: No explanation is really needed here. I don’t feel well after discovering that he can’t change and be a better person for me and us. I never deserved the pain he brought into my life, and yet I endured because of love. Love makes you foolish. And he continues to bring me pain and trust-breaking actions every time I need him the most.